"1 eating on a goddamn patio. YOU LOVE IT. the smell of exhaust wafting through the surrounding air, the feeling of disease-carrying insects sinking their tiny stingers into your tender flesh and laying microscopic eggs in your hair, the prying eyes of the homeless asking if you’re going to finish that last bite of your $30 arugula salad: grass stains and flip flops and boob sweat, OH MY."

-“summer is the worst.”


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"Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not."

Tina Fey on writing. (via politicsprose)

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Gratitude is:

  • Tacos
  • Making friends on the Internet
  • Learning how to be happy for good people when good things happen to them because Maturity, Growth, and Good People Deserve Good Things…DUH!
  • A friend you unfortunately don’t talk to much because of hectic schedules and who offers to pay for your boba/bubble tea because he wants to (pro tip: it’s boba)
  • Roommates that make pecan pie and cupcakes encourage me to eat all of the things
  • A dude that indulges in my usual radio rap tendencies and appreciates - even if he doesn’t get! - my love for Drake, Rick Ross, Tyga, YG, et. al.
  • The fact that Target has a grocery section
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I forgot how to fail

It’s been six months and still no full time job. I’ve been scraping by freelance gigs and a very VERY part time job and I’m just so thankful that my rent is disgustingly cheap even if I do have to share it with the most voracious bunny in all of the land (IT CHEWED THROUGH THE SPINE OF FIVE BOOKS, A FAKE LEATHER BAG BUT MY BAG NONETHELESS, A RUG RACHEL GOT ME TWO BIRTHDAYS AGO, MY MINNIE RIPERTON VINYL COVER THAT COST ME FOUR BUCKS BUT STILL, ETC. FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS I GET IT. ALSO HATE THE TERM FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS).

I had three interviews lined up within a week of each other and I was flying high on the possibilities like, It’s FINALLY HERE. FUCK YES. And then I found last week that I didn’t get any of the jobs and so add that to the list of I-stopped-counting-how-many-rejections. Of course, I’m crying and freaking out because money and I just want a stable job like every person out there and to be comfortable and….

Right now it’s hard for me to be happy for my friends’ successes even though they deserve them and they worked hard for them all the same.  And I know what is posted on Facebook or Instagram is a highlight reel but, man, does it mess with your mind. I should completely do away with my Facebook. That shit is awful. Facebook bought Occulus for a billion dollars. Just put me away on a farm already! I’m done.

But then I had this moment last Friday, walking to Target to pick up the pills I get discounted because I actually have health insurance now, where I had my headphones in and it finally felt like summer, and I slowly accepted what was happening. I thought, “OMG I failed but I didn’t die. I DIDN’T DIE.” Yeah, OMG. That is really what I thought. I realize this sounds soooo dramatic and let’s have an Oprah chai but, guys, I’m alive and I’m ok! I forgot what it feels like to make yourself vulnerable and then flop a big ole turd.

The whole moment took me back a year ago when I took improv classes and we were encouraged to fail to the top. I remember so many times coming up with weak stuff in the beginning and overanalyzing every bit even though that scene will NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN. Literally, I’d stay up all night replaying every scene to see what I could’ve done differently and then be embarrassed in private, hoping that people still want to do scenes with me or think I’m funny.

So back I go failing my way to the top. Not that I ever really left. The job looking/applying process has never stopped. But GODDAMN does it need to.

I love what Norm Macdonald had to say about the nature of creativity and who gets the credit.


Norm sent off this missive last night on Twitter (edited together and for clarity):

"It is sad to me that so many great comics are not working because they are dismissed as being ‘difficult’ or ‘crazy.’ I worked with 2 of them.

The first I worked for was Roseanne Barr and she taught me…

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NYC: Help Find Comedian and Columbia Student Jiwon Lee



Our friend Jiwon Lee is missing. She is 5’2 and 120 pounds and, though this is not in the police notice, you should know also that she is smart and beautiful and great. We are all hoping for her safe return.

As a stand-up comic and producer, she was an integral part of…

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Ellie Kemper & Tina Fey on “Tooken” set.

(via bossypants)

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Blanket embargo on, “Is that a thing?” stat. It is twitch inducing. Carry on.

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In this episode: We bring you a story from the archives of our Storytelling Workshop. It’s a story about a West Side youth movement and dance called Bopping. Tariq Weaver explores the origins of the dance, and who are the rising talents of this subculture.

Also, host Jesse Menendez spoke with critically acclaimed jazz pianist Robert Glasper. Robert spoke about his new album Black Radio 2 and his desire to shake up traditional jazz by incorporating elements you don’t generally hear in it.

MorningAMp’s Molly and Brian spoke with comedian Godfrey during his Chicago visit. He talks about growing up in Chicago and the 90s comedy scene.

We close the show the usual way - a DJ set. This one is courtesy of Vocalo DJ Collective Member, DJ Charlie. Tune in!

The Vocalo workshop introduced me to Tariq and now we’re friends and he’s just the best. The best! Y’all should shut up and listen.

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When Journalistic Ethics Aren’t So Ethical


In the course of writing a story about a golf club, a Grantland journalist named Caleb Hannan discovered that the club’s inventor was a transgender woman. She ended up committing suicide, which, though he doesn’t seem to realize it’s a possibility, could very well be the result of his outing…

(Source: therumpus.net)

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